A nun came up to her Mother Superior and asks her to hear her confession.
“Today I enjoyed the pleasure of the flesh. Father Murphy came to me and told me that I had the gates of Heaven between my legs. Then he said that he had the key to heaven, and put it in the gates ”
I was a very happy man.
My wonderful girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married. There was only one little thing bothering me…It was her beautiful younger sister.
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A woman was having a daytime affair while her husband was at work. One wet and gusty day she was in bed with her boyfriend when, to her horror, she heard her husband’s car pull into the driveway.
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The Englishman’s wife steps up to the first tee and, as she bends over to place her ball, a gust of wind blows her skirt up and reveals her lack of underwear. “Good God, woman! Why aren’t you wearing any knickers?” her husband demanded. “Well, you don’t give me enough housekeepin money to afford any,” she replied. The Englishman immediately reaches into his pocket and says, “For the sake of decency, here’s $50. Go and buy yourself some underwear.”
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