During a recent password audit, it was found that a blonde was using the following password:
“MickeyMinniePlutoHueyLouieDeweyDonaldGoofyWashington”
When asked why she had such a long password, she said she was told that it had to be at least 8 characters long and include at least one capital
Rachel, Clare and Samantha haven’t seen each other since High School. They rediscover each other through a reunion website and arrange to meet for lunch in a wine bar.
Rachel arrives first and orders a bottle of chilled Chablis. Clare enters a few minutes later and after hugs and kisses, she joins Rachel in a glass of Chablis.
Then Sam walks in wearing a faded anorak, blue jeans and Wellington boots. She too shares the wine.
Rachel explains that after leaving school and graduating from Oxford in Classics, she met and married Timothy with whom she has a beautiful daughter. Timothy is a partner in one of London ’s leading law firms. They live in a penthouse in North London where their daughter attends drama school. They have a second home in the hills above Monte Carlo .
Clare says she graduated from King’s College and became a Consultant Gynaecologist. Her husband Clive is a leading A&E Consultant. They live in a large detached house in Dulwich and have a second home in Florida .
Sam tells them that she left school at seventeen and ran off with her boyfriend Ben. They run a tropical bird park in Norfolk and grow their own vegetables. Ben can stand five canaries side by side on his willy.
Half way through the third bottle of Chablis, Rachel blurts out that her husband isn’t Timothy he’s Tom and he’s a clerk for Islington Council. They live in a terraced house in Muswell Hill and keep a caravan in France .
Clare, chastened and encouraged by her friend’s honesty, explains that she and Clive are both nurses in King’s College. They live in Herne Hill and have a timeshare in Orlando .
Samantha admits that the fifth canary has to stand on one leg
Whats the difference between Cinderella and the England football team?
Cinderella wanted to get to the ball…………
Osama bin Laden has just released a new TV message to prove he is still
alive. He said that the England Team performance on Sunday was completely
s**t. British intelligence have dismissed the claim, stating that the
message could have been recorded anytime in the last 44 years.
Robert Green – The only man to leave Africa with out catching anything .
In a statement from broadcasting house, all future England games will now
be shown on the gay porn channel. It is thought that 11 arsåholes being
regularly shafted is too explicit for regular TV.
I can’t believe we only managed a draw against a s**t team we should easily
have beaten……I’m ashamed to call myself Algerian.
The England team went to visit an orphanage in South Africa this morning,
“its so good to put a smile on the faces of people with no hope, constantly
struggling, and facing the impossible” said Jamal Omboto, aged 6.
Fifa have released a statement saying the fan didn’t break into the
dressing room after all, but was let in by Rob Green.
What’s the difference between Rob Green’s spill and BP’s spill?
- Robert Green has got a cap for his.
Fabio Capello was wheeling his shopping trolley across the supermarket car
park when he noticed an old lady struggling with her bags of shopping. He
stopped and asked, “Can you manage dear?” To which the old lady replied,
“No way. You got yourself into this f*****g mess, don’t ask me to sort it
out…”
The FA have launched an inquiry to find out how a fan found his way into
the dressing room. And another enquiry into how Aaron Lennon found his way
into the dressing room.
David Blaine is gutted that the record he got for doing F*** all in a box for 42 days has just been beaten by Wayne Rooney
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When you think your’e having a bad day …………..read this and know that it could have been worse.
While walking through Golden Gate Park in San Francisco , a man came upon another man hugging a tree with his ear firmly against the tree. Seeing this he inquired, “Just out of curiosity, what are you doing?”
“I’m listening to the music of the tree,” the other man replied.
“You’ve gotta be kiddin’ me.”
“No, would you like to give it a try?”
Understandably curious, the man says, “Well, OK…” So he wrapped his arms around the tree and pressed his ear up against it. With this, the other guy slapped a pair of handcuffs on him, took his wallet, watch, car keys, then stripped him naked and left.
Two hours later another nature lover strolled by, saw this guy handcuffed to the tree stark naked, and asked, “What happened to you?”
He told the guy the whole terrible story about how he got there. When he finished his story, the other guy shook his head in sympathy, walked around behind him, kissed him gently behind the ear and said, “This just ain’t gonna be your day, cupcake…”
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